#196: How to Let Go of Your Inner Perfectionist with Dr. Jane Tornatore

Harness the Power of Your Perfectionism

  • Learn the science behind how we become perfectionists neurologically 
  • How practicing gratitude can create new neuropathways and change your mindset
  • Tips for changing the way we talk and think about ourselves and others
  • New and simple techniques to help you activate your sympathetic nervous system 
  • Ways that you can hack the normal processing of your brain to stop limiting beliefs 

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Episode Summary

Everybody has beliefs about themselves and the world that simply just aren’t true. Our inner perfectionist is something that is hardwired into our brain, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make it work for us instead of against us. Dr. Jane Tornatore is a therapist, speaker, and author who has combined thousands of patient experiences and 15 years of practice into her new book, Everything Is Perfect, Just Not Me, and is here today to help you overcome your perfectionism. 

Dr. Jane is a recovering perfectionist who helps her clients stop being hard on themselves and start believing that they are worthy of love. She has dedicated her career to helping people love themselves and is here today to provide you with techniques you probably haven’t heard of before so that you can address your inner perfectionist and start on a path to self-love. 

The unconscious and limiting beliefs that you may have been telling yourself since childhood is getting in the way of living a positive life. Whether we like it or not, our brains are hardwired to look for danger which can often result in negative thinking. By replacing ‘should, must need and have to’ with language that promotes self-compassion and kindness, you can reality check your ego and start creating new neuropathways that focus on what is in your power, not out of your control. 

If you are searching for a broader understanding of how and why we think the way that we do and need some hope in your ability to reframe the way you think, Dr. Jane is the expert for you.

Are you ready to stop letting perfectionism stunt your true growth and potential? Share what you loved most about Dr. Jane’s new and exciting perspective with us in the comments below!


“I was in school to help others be healthy, but I wasn’t even thinking about self-love. I wasn’t even thinking that maybe I am the most important person to help. So that was the time that it was a huge wake-up call, and I am forever grateful.” (9:25)

“We take these truths about the world and about ourselves in it, and they become unconscious beliefs. Until we actively and consciously look at them and give ourselves contradicting evidence, we will carry them until they are addressed and we can build new neuropathways and new beliefs. (13:13)

“Literally when we use the words ‘need, must, should, have to’, we are creating an extra layer of pressure that we have to push through in order to do the task we think is important. So what I would use instead of ‘should, must, have to, need and gotta’, is ‘it’s a good idea, it would be helpful and only if it’s really, really true, I want too and I’d like too’.” (26:28)

“[Breathwork] is a beautiful opportunity to help people access their own inner wisdom and be curious about the tool rather than just ‘oh, it doesn’t work for me’.” (36:00)

“I like myself because I want too. It can be that simple.” (45:13)

Resources Mentioned

Dr. Jane Tornatore Everyday Love Website

Everything Is Perfect, Just Not Me by Dr. Jane Tornatore

Sign Up For Dr. Janes’ Love Notes Newsletter

Follow Dr. Jane on Facebook

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